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antara

antara
naha , tripura

Antara Naha (23) dressed in a bluish-black kameez and a bright red dupatta draped over her left shoulder stands in front of a large rectangular piece of hardboard propped up on a tripod. Behind the tripod is an open window with horizontal iron bars. Antara’s hair has a centre parting and her straight black ponytail reaches down her back to her waist. In a white plastic tray to her right there are several many-coloured sketch pens. There are five sheets of drawing paper stuck to the board. All the sheets have drawings of objects done with sketch pens: an upside-down red-and-white paper cup on one sheet, and on the other four sheets, black-and-white keys of different shapes – there are keys to locks as well as two-wheeler ignition keys. Her left hand presses against one of the sheets and she is drawing on it with a pen in her right hand. The room has a sky-blue wall meeting a lilac wall at the corner.
Profile shot of Antara in black kameez and red dupatta, sitting in a computer chair in front of a teakwood-coloured table. There is a desktop computer on the table which has a sliding tray for the keyboard. Her right hand is operating a mouse and left hand rests on the keyboard. The wall behind her is lilac.
Antara is sitting on her haunches in the balcony next to the a crisscross iron railing. She wears a red T-shirt and dark blue track pants. On the narrow raised ledge at the bottom of the railing there are two yellow plastic pots and a wide-mouthed transparent plastic container, each containing soil and a sapling. On the balcony floor there are large plastic pots – three red, one beige and one clay-coloured. Antara is re-potting a sapling into one of the red pots. Next to her there is a plastic bag of soil with a sapling in it. The wall behind her and the open door are painted the same shade of pista green.
Antara sits cross-legged on a cream floor with a lilac wall in the background. She wears dark blue track pants and a yellow and black T-shirt. There are textbooks spread out on the floor in front of her and she is writing in a notebook with a ballpoint pen.
Antara and her family pose on a wooden sofa. From left to right: her sister Ambika Naha (15), father Barun Kumar Naha (59), Antara, and mother Anjana Naha Datta (58). Ambika sits on the arm of the sofa. She wears a full-sleeved one-piece jumpsuit in stripes of blue, black and white. Barun is dressed in faded blue jeans and a half-sleeved shirt in tiny checks of red, blue and white. He wears specs and his salt-and-pepper hair is slight balding at the forehead. Antara wears a three-fourth-sleeved black maxi with white embroidery at the sleeves, front and bottom. Anjana wears a magenta blouse with a sari in a magenta and grey design. The room has a sky-blue wall behind them and pista green walls on either side. There is a window in the blue wall, covered with a curtain in a chocolate brown and beige pattern. A formal group photo taken outside a government building hangs on this wall. Antara and Ambika are smiling at each other. Barun is smiling at Antara and Anjana is smiling at Ambika.
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“I am keen on art and my ambition is to teach painting to children someday”

A child with an invisible disability might suffer its consequences for years on end before her parents comprehend what she has endured. Ask Barun Kumar Naha (59) from Agartala, Tripura, father of 23-year-old Antara. When she was a child, Barun and his wife Anjana Naha Datta couldn’t figure out why she was so aloof and unresponsive. Such behaviour can easily be misunderstood as stubbornness, indifference or disrespect.
 
Barun narrates an incident that pains him even today when he recalls it. While having lunch he asked Antara to fetch him some water. She ignored him. Frustrated, he started hitting her but she stood before him stony-faced and didn’t shed a tear. Barun instantly regretted his action and even more so when, much later, the after-effect of the beating made her cry. He also realised that day that something was amiss about his daughter.
 
“Because you can’t see a mental disability, it becomes tough to identify, understand, and accept it,” Barun reminisces. “A mental health problem can feel just as bad as, or worse than, any physical illness and requires just as much support.” This realisation came only after he and Anjana went through years of groping in the dark for answers. It is a mistaken assumption that parents who are well-educated (Barun is in the police service and Anjana a college teacher) would be better equipped to detect that their child has a ‘problem’. Mental health remains a closed book for most of us.
 
Antara was admitted to a government school, the Shishu Bihar Higher Secondary School. However, the class teacher observed her mood swings and lack of social interaction and asked her parents to pull her out of school. They hired a home tutor, who was quick to point out Antara’s behavioural problems. The tutor’s daughter was a doctor, who surmised that she may have a thyroid issue. They took her to one of Tripura’s well-known hospitals which found nothing wrong with her thyroid and recommended they take her to the Psychiatry department where she was treated for three years. At one point Antara lost her appetite and became so thin that “we feared that we would lose her”, says Barun. Acting on the recommendation of senior doctors in the department, in 2011 when Antara had reached seventh grade they went to the National Institute for Mental Health and Neuro-Sciences (NIMHANS) in Bengaluru.
 
A new chapter opened for Antara at NIMHANS. The doctors told them that apart from the medication, what she most needed was "to always be kept in a happy frame of mind.” That became the mantra for Antara’s family. Barun recalls that when Antara was young she used to hanker after a brother or sister, and she was overjoyed when Ambika was born. Ambika is now 15 and there is a strong bond between the sisters. Anjana made a special effort to support and motivate Antara. Since she has mood swings, they strive to keep her occupied and active. They enrolled her in yoga, which significantly helped her. Barun takes her for swimming lessons, which she enjoys.
 
Antara’s 10th grade results were unsatisfactory but after switching to a private school she completed high school after a two-year break. Art seemed to hold a great appeal for her, so they admitted her in the Government College of Art and Craft. She is in the final year of her arts course. “I wish to teach painting to children,” she told us.
 
Red is Antara’s favourite colour. She likes to celebrate Durga Puja with her sister by wearing new clothes. Gardening brings her peace. She enjoys travelling and remembers her trip to Kanyakumari and Bengaluru. Although doctors have told the family that her disability would be a lifelong challenge, they remain hopeful that she will flourish under their loving care.
 

Photos:

Vicky Roy

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